


fresh blood, this love

by angstinspace



Category: Hades (Video Game 2018)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Canon-Typical Violence, Confessions, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Kissing, M/M, POV Thanatos (Hades Video Game), Pining Thanatos (Hades Video Game)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-24
Updated: 2021-02-24
Packaged: 2021-03-15 04:40:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,003
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29678547
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/angstinspace/pseuds/angstinspace
Summary: Zagreus shook again, with what Thanatos thought at first was another cough. Instead, he saw that Zagreus was grinning.“Are you ... laughing?”“Maybe,” Zagreus answered. “I was just thinking ... if I’d known the only way to get you to hold me was by dying for you ... perhaps I should’ve tried it sooner.”Thanatos and Zagreus reunite after Zagreus’s first escape from the Underworld, and Thanatos is dealing with some complicated feelings—especially when Zagreus gets hurt trying to protect him.
Relationships: Thanatos/Zagreus (Hades Video Game)
Comments: 22
Kudos: 221





	fresh blood, this love

**Author's Note:**

  * For [starluci](https://archiveofourown.org/users/starluci/gifts).



> this is a (very late) birthday present for my wonderful friend [angie](https://twitter.com/stelllalights)! i wrote this a couple months ago and have eagerly awaited being able to post it, this is the first thanzag fic i wrote and i had so much fun with it!!
> 
> some mild warnings: this fic takes place after zag’s first escape from the underworld, so there are some spoilers regarding that. secondly, there’s a bit of violence/bloodshed but it’s not much more graphic than anything in canon; aka a character gets stabbed but it’s not described in much detail. 
> 
> thank you to [jessie](https://twitter.com/parchmints) for beta’ing this (and for helping to organize ang’s bday zine), ilsym! 
> 
> (title comes from “[fresh blood](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8uS0TkpXNlM)” by m.bronx)

There were rumors that Zagreus had reached the surface. 

Thanatos first heard the news upon returning to the Elysium after a particularly exhausting day collecting souls. Translucent shades hovered in clusters along the cliff sides and scattered over the verdant plains. But instead of their usual discussion of their own deaths, they were all buzzing with gossip. 

_Did you hear? He actually made it to the surface this time._

_After all those tries ... he must’ve died, what, thirty times? I’ve lost count._

Thanatos floated towards the conversing shades. Each time one of them spoke, a glowing orb of light pulsed at the center of the circle. 

_Wait,_ who _made it to the surface?_

_Haven’t you been paying attention at all? The prince, of course!_

Thanatos’s hands tightened around the handle of his scythe. The words reverberated through his mind, like the cursed nymph Echo eternally lamenting her woes. 

The prince ... Prince Zagreus ... _Zag_ ... had reached the surface? 

_Is he still up there?_ one of the shades was asking now.

_Why wouldn’t he be?_ another answered. _He spent all this time trying to escape ..._

_You’ve seen how the Olympian gods keep aiding him. Perhaps they intend for him to join them on Olympus._

_No_ , was Thanatos’s first coherent thought. Zagreus wouldn’t have disappeared with no intention of returning. Not without saying goodbye. ... Would he?

He’d known this day would come. He had seen the way Zagreus had suffered one death after another in his efforts to escape. Thanatos had even assisted him on many occasions, fighting alongside the prince to defeat the nefarious wretches. 

In some backwards way, he’d thought that if he helped Zagreus enough, it would be enough proof that _someone_ down here cared about him. Someone wanted him to stay.

Thanatos might have questioned the shades further about what they’d heard, but they all gasped and scattered as soon as they took notice of him. He seemed to have that effect.

Everyone wanted to run away from him. 

  


* * *

  


No matter what he did, Thanatos couldn’t release the painful knot that had taken root in his chest.

He avoided the House of Hades. He couldn’t stand the thought of returning to his usual spot on the balcony above the Styx, waiting for a certain someone who might never return. Thanatos tried to imagine the House without Zagreus—his crooked grin and bright laughter, his never-ending efforts to spruce up the place with new furniture and petals scattered everywhere. 

Eventually, he would need to accept the truth: if Zagreus had made it to the surface, the two of them would never see each other again. 

It was easier said than done. Especially after everything he and Zagreus had been through together, he’d foolishly believed that maybe, _maybe_ , the prince reciprocated his feelings. The way he’d grinned at Thanatos each time they’d defeated a horde of wretches together, the way he’d often sought out Thanatos at the House to gift him nectar ... had it all meant nothing? 

He’d thought it was a promise of some kind, but maybe it had merely been an apology of sorts. Or a goodbye. 

Such thoughts haunted Thanatos as he aimlessly wandered the Underworld. When he wasn’t busy collecting souls, he mostly stuck to the vast fields of Elysium, but a few times he traveled to the fiery pits of Asphodel for a change of scenery. 

He wasn’t sure what he was searching for—or perhaps he did, but he wouldn’t find it. Wouldn’t find _him_. 

He sometimes expelled malicious wretches with sweeps of his scythe, just to keep himself occupied. He knew he could get in trouble for such deeds, but the wretches regenerated anyway. Besides, it wasn’t like Hades could terminate Thanatos’s position; he needed a God of Death to fill the Underworld with souls, after all. 

But even fighting evil spirits soon lost its satisfaction. Every time Thanatos cleared a chamber by himself, there was no sense of fulfillment—only a hollow feeling as he took in the empty surroundings, missing the sound of the prince exclaiming in victory. 

  


* * *

  


The passage of time was difficult to determine in the confines of the Underworld. But from his journeys above to harvest souls, Thanatos estimated that almost a week had passed in the mortal realm. 

Returning one day from his usual excursion, he sensed a disturbance in the air. It was similar to the change he’d felt when Zagreus had escaped, like something was _different_. But this time, it was a certain familiar feeling—one he hadn’t felt in weeks. 

_It can’t be_ ... He couldn’t get his hopes up, when he knew Zagreus was gone forever. 

Despite his doubts, he transported himself from one chamber of Elysium to another. And at last, he appeared in one chamber that felt distinct from the others, as if a bolt of Zeus’s lightning had electrified the air. 

As Thanatos materialized in a flash of light, he saw someone sprinting towards him—a figure wearing a red chiton and wielding a golden spear, his glowing feet leaving sparks in his wake. 

Usually Thanatos would announce his presence, but he found himself speechless. How could Zagreus be here? Hadn’t he left the Underworld? If so, why had he _returned_? 

The questions died in his throat as soon as Zagreus was close enough that Thanatos could get a better look at him. Besides a few minor scrapes and bruises, he looked relatively unharmed. Thanatos also recognized the Aspect of Achilles, and was simultaneously shocked and impressed that the prince had been entrusted with it. 

Zagreus came to a stumbling stop, breaking into a crooked grin. “Than!” He paused to catch his breath. “It’s been quite a while.” 

The temporary relief Thanatos had felt was drowned out by another, colder emotion. “Zagreus,” he replied, his tone clipped. “Yes, it has. Heard you made it all the way to the surface.”

He stated it with icy nonchalance, some secret part of him hoping that Zagreus would deny it. Instead, Zagreus’s smile vanished and he looked away as he scratched the back of his neck. 

“So, you heard about that. I’m afraid it’s a bit complicated—”

Before he could finish his explanation, there was a faint _twang_ and an arrow shot past Thanatos’s shoulder. 

“Than, look out!” 

There was a loud whoosh like the crash of the ocean against the shore, and Zagreus appeared at Thanatos’s side. The phantom shape of blue waves rushed out behind him as he dashed forward—a blessing from Lord Poseidon, no doubt. 

An army of wretches materialized around them—mostly Strongbows, Longspears, and Brightswords. The glowing orb of a Soul Catcher floated in one corner of the chamber, generating a swarm of nasty butterflies. 

Thanatos wielded his scythe in front of him, levitating several more inches off the ground as the grass stirred underneath him. “Looks like we’ll have to discuss it later.”

“Looks like it,” Zagreus agreed. “Now, care for one of our usual matches?”

“Fine. But be prepared to lose.”

Zagreus barked out a sharp laugh. “We’ll see about that.”

He twirled the spear as if it weighed nothing—a shameless display of showmanship that Thanatos should have found aggravating. Instead, it made something warm stir through him that felt like … _fondness_ , perhaps. He’d missed these meaningless little contests, missed the banter that always preceded it, missed the prince’s cocky grin.

He had missed Zagreus.

But now was not the time to admit that, as the wretches closed in on them.

“Enough talking.” Thanatos gathered a dark circle of power around himself. “Let’s do this.”

It felt natural to fall back into their usual routine, like it was an intricate dance that they both knew by heart. Thanatos transported himself from one area of the chamber to another. His power drained the essence from each enemy until they were once again reduced to darkness, disappearing with emanations of skull-shaped smoke. 

Around him was the familiar clamor of the battle—the Brightswords letting out their strange guttural sounds as they struck the ground, releasing glowing spikes that sprung from the soil like scales, the swish of arrows as the Strongbows fired into the air. 

Zagreus’s battle cry rose over the noise, accompanied by a powerful rush as he spun in a full circle with his spear extended. Each time Thanatos heard the sound, there was a brief prickle of panic underneath his skin, and he had to spare a glance over his shoulder to ensure Zagreus had yelled in fury and not in pain. It was probably a bit of each, judging by a few nasty cuts on his chest and arms. But he was still standing, dodging most of the blows that were thrown at him and taking down wretches with each wide swing of his spear. 

Thanatos tried to focus on clearing his own portion of the battlefield. He had finally defeated the Soul Catcher, and its butterflies disintegrated along with it. All that was left was one pesky Wretched Witch, screeching in one corner and releasing violet orbs of magic. 

Soon the witch had dissolved at a fierce slash of Thanatos’s scythe, and silence descended. But just when Thanatos thought the fight was over, he heard a warning cry. 

“ _Than_!”

There was another loud whooshing noise as Zagreus dashed forward. A rush of cool air hit Thanatos as he whirled around, and he caught the faint, salty scent of the ocean. 

Zagreus had used the burst of power from Poseidon’s boon to propel himself forward, and Thanatos didn’t understand why at first glance ... until he noticed the Longspear running straight towards him with its weapon poised.

At the last moment, Zagreus threw himself between Thanatos and the wretch who’d been about to attack him. And, as Thanatos watched in speechless horror, the Longspear drove its weapon into Zagreus’s chest. 

The shade attacked with a fast jabbing motion, its spear a mere blur. Blood sprayed the air. Zagreus staggered back and regained his balance, raising his weapon like he still intended to defend himself ... only for the spear to drop to the ground. Zagreus dropped to his knees beside it. 

“Zagreus!”

Thanatos almost didn’t recognize his own voice, how it sounded like it was being strangled out of him. He flew forward and summoned his circle of power again. The Longspear had pulled its weapon back as if it planned to make another strike—but almost as soon as it was encompassed by the dark circle on the ground, it released a choked cry and evaporated into smoke. 

A sick sense of satisfaction came over Thanatos as the glow of magic faded. It didn’t last for long, though, as he turned and saw Zagreus had slumped onto his side and wasn’t moving. 

Thanatos dropped his scythe and knelt next to his fallen friend. Now that he was closer, he could see the steady stream of blood snaking through the grass, bright red contrasting against jade green. 

Zagreus was still alive. Thanatos could sense it even before he gathered the prince into his arms. Although Zagreus remained limp, his eyes closed and his head lolling back, Thanatos could feel the flickering energy of his soul, like a thread on the verge of snapping but refusing to break. Stubborn as always.

“Zagreus,” Thanatos said hoarsely. He lay a hand over the wound, like he could somehow redirect the flow of blood back into Zagreus’s heart.

He could feel the Styx already rising up to take Zagreus away, could see the faint reddish haze of light starting to surround them, but Thanatos only held on more tightly.

It was probably fruitless to resist the inevitable pull of the river; he knew better than anyone that there was no escaping death. He also knew that Zagreus couldn’t truly die, that he’d soon emerge in the House of Hades completely well and whole.

Despite that, he didn’t want to let Zagreus slip away. Not when he didn’t know if they’d see each other again.

He tried again, more insistently. “ _Zag_.”

The nickname, of all things, pulled the prince from the depths of oblivion. His eyelids fluttered, and he groaned as his eyes opened, their contrasting tones catching the light. “Than?” he said weakly. A wet cough shook through him. “You’ve come to take me away, I assume?”

He didn’t sound disturbed at the prospect of dying, mostly just tired. Thanatos supposed that was to be expected, considering Zagreus had died dozens of painful deaths by now.

“No,” Thanatos said. “I mean, I ...”

He realized, then, that he was tired of losing Zagreus again and again, even if it was temporary. He was tired of Zagreus getting himself hurt or _killed_ as if his only existence was to suffer. 

Zagreus shook again, with what Thanatos thought at first was another cough. Instead, he saw that Zagreus was grinning. 

“Are you ... _laughing_?”

“Maybe,” Zagreus answered. “I was just thinking ... if I’d known the only way to get you to hold me was by dying for you ... perhaps I should’ve tried it sooner.”

Thanatos’s thoughts shut down. _What_ had Zagreus just said? It couldn’t have meant what it had sounded like.

“Also,” Zagreus went on, his eyelids drooping, “I must say, you’re rather handsome when you’re worried.”

Thanatos blinked, certain he’d misheard. Either that, or Zagreus was delirious with pain.

“Zagreus—”

Zagreus’s eyes closed again as he sagged into Thanatos’s arms. “... I’ll see you around, Than,” he murmured, the words slurring together. He fell still. 

Thanatos looked over his motionless face, searching for any flicker of movement, but there was nothing. He still had a hand pressed to Zagreus’s blood-streaked chest, and could feel the weak pulse of his heart slowing. 

_Let him go_ , a small voice at the back of Thanatos’s mind whispered. He wasn’t sure if it was his own thoughts or a silent command from the Styx itself. He knew he should listen ... yet, he clung to Zagreus in some feeble attempt to stop him from leaving.

He wasn’t sure what compelled him to look up, searching for something to aid him—but right then, his eye caught on a glimmer of violet amidst the green scenery. One of Charon’s fountains was hidden in the shadows close to the gate, its tempting waters sparkling in the light. 

Thanatos had the faintest spark of an idea—one that could potentially get him in trouble for defying Lord Hades and perhaps the Fates themselves. But, as he looked down at Zagreus lying limp in his arms, he made up his mind. Zagreus had gotten hurt to protect him. It seemed only fair to help him in return. 

Clinging to that logic, Thanatos slid one arm under Zagreus’s knees while the other arm stayed securely under his shoulders. “I’ve got you, Zag,” he said quietly. 

He got up and floated a few inches off the ground, hovering in place as if waiting to see if Hades would strike him down for his defiance. When nothing happened, he drifted towards the fountain. 

The ghostly forms of shades materialized at the fringes of the chamber. Thanatos did his best to ignore their whispering, although he was certain the pesky ghosts were already preparing to spread rumors, ones that would probably make it all the way back to the House. 

Thanatos put such things out of his mind. He reached the fountain, where he gently set Zagreus down. Then he looked into the depths of the water, where coins glittered at the bottom like shimmering scales. 

Part of him hoped he wouldn’t be obligated to make payment. But when he reached a hand out, a glowing message hovered over the fountain with a number of prices listed. Thanatos rolled his eyes. That was Charon, alright. Greedy as ever. 

Still, Thanatos fished out a few coins and tossed them in. Nothing happened at first, except a few ripples disrupting the surface of the water. But then a flash of purple light indicated that the payment had been accepted. A vial of Life Essence floated to the surface, bobbing in place before Thanatos snatched it up. 

Wasting no time, he uncorked the vial and knelt down next to Zagreus, who was slumped back against the base of the fountain. Thanatos reached out to gently adjust Zagreus’s position, keeping a hand behind his neck as he tilted the prince’s head back, while his other hand lifted the vial to Zagreus’s slack mouth. 

Zagreus remained pale and still at first, as some of the metallic liquid dribbled from his lips. But then there was a faint shimmer in the air around him. His wounds began to seal closed, and a spasm ran through his body as he sputtered and coughed. A wave of relief washed over Thanatos as he watched the prince’s eyes blink open again. 

“Than— _ugh_.” Zagreus choked, lifting his head and wiping the back of his hand across his mouth. “Blood and darkness. Are you trying to drown me?”

“Drink,” Thanatos answered coolly, holding the vial out towards him. 

Zagreus’s eyes flitted from the vial to Thanatos’s face and back again. “What—is that Life Essence? Where did you—” 

Thanatos nodded towards the fountain. He offered no other explanation, extending the vial out as he waited for Zagreus to take it. “There’s still about half of it left, and you’re not fully healed. Drink it.”

“But—” Zagreus started to say, then stopped as he read the look on Thanatos’s face. “Oh, alright. If you insist.” 

He took the vial from Thanatos’s hand, examining it before tipping the remainder of its contents into his mouth. Thanatos watched him, gaze fixating on the way Zagreus’s throat bobbed as he drank. 

Once Zagreus drained the Essence, he sighed and tossed the empty vial aside. “Refreshing,” he commented as he got to his feet. “Thank you, Thanatos. Now, what do I owe you?”

Thanatos had risen up at the same time, crossing his arms. “What do you mean?” 

“For the Life Essence. Surely it must have cost you something.” 

“You don’t owe me anything for it, Zagreus. You already threw yourself in front of that Longspear for me. Which was pointless, by the way. You know I can’t die, don’t you?”

“Well … yes, I know. But I can’t really die, either. Think of it as more of a symbolic gesture, alright?”

“Symbolic ... ?” Thanatos started to repeat, then caught movement out of the corner of his eye.

Several clusters of shades lingered around the perimeter of the chamber. Thanatos let out a short sigh. Why, of all times, were all these ghosts being so _meddlesome_? 

“Look ... Than,” Zagreus said. He took a step to the side like he was preparing to dash away. “Thanks for all your help, but I probably should be—”

Thanatos shot out a hand and caught Zagreus by the arm. “Wait,” he said. “I know you don’t have much time, but ... I think we should talk.”

“Really? You want to talk _now_?”

“Is there something wrong with that?”

Zagreus hesitated. “I ... no, not exactly. It’s just, I don’t know, usually you vanish in the blink of an eye every time I try to have a conversation with you. You can’t blame me for being surprised.” 

Thanatos’s jaw clenched. He had probably deserved that. “I know. But right now, there’s an important matter I was hoping we could discuss. I’d just like to talk about it somewhere more ... private.” 

_That_ seemed to catch Zagreus’s attention, his eyes flickering with interest before he masked it again. 

“I see. And I suppose you’re not going to tell me what this _private matter_ is until we’re alone?”

“Correct,” Thanatos said. “Now, come along.” 

He had almost expected Zagreus to quarrel with him, but the prince suddenly seemed eager to go wherever Thanatos led. 

After they’d retrieved their weapons from the bloodstained grass, they wandered through the lush environment of Elysium until they found a secluded alcove where there were no onlookers in sight. 

Thanatos, still hovering an inch above the ground, turned around to face Zagreus. 

“So,” he said, “it’s true, then? That you escaped?”

Zagreus looked perplexed for a moment, like he’d been expecting Thanatos to ask him something else. He looked away. “Yes, it’s true,” he admitted. 

“Then, why did you come back?” 

The prince was oddly silent, only meeting Thanatos’s eyes with a brief look of surprise.

“It’s a bit hard to explain,” he said, “but the truth is that I—I couldn’t ...”

Thanatos noted his sudden change in tone, how he sounded ... defeated, almost. Or like he was terrified of saying whatever he was about to say. 

“Couldn’t what?”

A short silence ensued before Zagreus released a heavy sigh.

“I couldn’t survive up there, alright? I mean, I literally couldn’t. I only managed to stay for a few minutes, before it felt like some horrible illness was coming over me, and then ...”

He brought his rambling to a stop, like he couldn’t bear to say the rest. But Thanatos understood, with a sudden twisting sensation in his gut, what Zagreus meant. 

Thanatos had been standing with his arms crossed, but now he slowly started to let them unfold. “Zagreus ...” he said, his tone gentler this time. “I’m so sorry.”

Zagreus seemed surprised by Thanatos’s apology, his eyes widening before he sobered again.

“I suppose it’s what I should’ve expected. I always thought my father prevented me from leaving because he wanted to control me. I didn’t realize there were ... other reasons.” 

His expression darkened as he uttered the words, and Thanatos had a feeling he was leaving out some vital detail. He studied Zagreus’s face as if he’d somehow be able to glean the hidden information from that alone. But it suddenly felt as if Zagreus had put up a wall between them, his posture stiff and his eyes stony. 

As much as he hated prying, there was still one thing Thanatos was desperate to know. He debated over whether or not to even ask, but ... if he didn’t find out now, he didn’t know if he’d get another chance. 

“Look, I hate to ask this. But, if you can’t survive up there ... what are you _doing_ , Zag? I mean, why are you trying to run away again?” 

“Ah, well ... about that.” Zagreus shifted his weight from one foot to the other. “There’s one other thing I haven’t told you. When I was up there, I ... found something important. Or someone, rather.” 

_Someone_ ... ? “Who?” Thanatos asked, his throat feeling oddly tight. 

Once again, Zagreus held back, like he wasn’t certain if he should answer. But after a moment’s hesitation, he relented. “My mother.”

“Oh.” Some of the tension eased from Thanatos’s shoulders. “Your mother is up there? You mean ...” 

“My birth mother, Persephone. Yes. I didn’t get to speak to her for long, though. And there’s still so much I need to ask her. I don’t know if you’ll understand this, but ... that’s the reason why I’m doing this again.”

Thanatos frowned. He understood why Zagreus wanted to see his mother again, but something about this whole situation left an unpleasant feeling crawling under his skin. “So, that’s it?” he said. “You’re going to keep doing this forever, getting yourself killed over and over again? Even though you can’t even survive up there?” 

Almost as soon as the words left his mouth, Thanatos regretted them. He was only trying to understand Zagreus’s intentions—but perhaps there had been more of a biting tone to his words than he’d intended, judging by the way they instilled a flash of hurt in Zagreus’s eyes. 

“I suppose that’s a fair enough question,” Zagreus replied. “But, yes. If that’s what it takes, I’ll keep trying. If I make it to the surface again, I can at least learn some things from my mother. About who I am, about who _she_ is, about why she left.”

The whole time Zagreus spoke, Thanatos felt as if he was listening from far away. When Zagreus had fallen silent, Thanatos gave a curt nod.

“I see.” He drifted a bit to one side, giving Zagreus space to move past him. “Well, then. I suppose that’s all I needed to know. I won’t keep you any longer.”

He expected that to be the end of the conversation, and he considered vanishing into thin air as he often did whenever he and Zagreus started to discuss anything even vaguely _emotional_. But something kept him lingering in place, especially when he noticed that Zagreus hadn’t moved. 

“You know, Than,” Zagreus said, “you’re making this awfully confusing.”

Thanatos frowned. “Making _what_ confusing?”

“Oh, you _know_ what. Listen, I didn’t realize you dragged me all the way out here to interrogate me. I thought maybe you were finally going to—” Zagreus stopped, sighing and pinching the bridge of his nose. 

“Zagreus?” Thanatos said, when the prince didn’t complete his sentence. “What are you saying?”

“It’s nothing. I suppose I just feel a bit humiliated, that’s all. And ... remorseful. I’m seeing now that I had the wrong idea, and I’m sorry if my advances have made you uncomfortable.” 

The words felt like a blow to the head, and Thanatos almost dropped his scythe. “ _What_?” 

“Oh.” Zagreus’s face blanched as he took in Thanatos’s shocked expression. “You—You didn’t know? And here I was, thinking I had been painfully obvious.” 

“Know ... what, exactly?”

Zagreus opened his mouth as if to respond, but then closed it. Sighing, he gave a small shake of his head. “Never mind, I think I’ve gone and already made things more complicated than they need to be,” he said. “I’m sorry, I’ll stop wasting your time with—”

“Zagreus, wait.” 

Thanatos reached out to grip Zagreus’s wrist. He suddenly realized what Zagreus must have felt all the times their roles had been reversed, and it had been Thanatos disappearing without finishing their conversation. 

Zagreus stiffened, glancing down at Thanatos’s hand, then up at his face. He said nothing, only blinking in bewilderment.

“I’m just trying to understand,” Thanatos said. “Why do you think I’ve been helping you all this time?” 

Zagreus didn’t answer right away. “Well,” he finally said, “that’s a bit difficult to answer, seeing as you haven’t told me. But if I were to hazard a guess, I would think it’s because you’re … trying to move things along a bit quicker, so that I’ll be out of here as soon as possible. Is that it?” 

Thanatos stared at him, stunned. “Is that really what you think?”

“I mean, at this point I’m really not sure _what_ to think. But it seems like the likeliest reason, considering how eager you always are to disappear on me.”

“I’m the one disappearing on _you_?” Thanatos scoffed. “What about how you were going to just run away without saying goodbye? Or how you’d apparently prefer to die a thousand times instead of staying here with—” 

He stopped, mortified, as he realized what he’d been about to say—but also because Zagreus was regarding him with his eyes round with wonder, like he was looking at Thanatos for the first time. 

“You ... want me to stay?” 

The question hung in the air, more terrifying than any battle Thanatos had ever fought. He knew that whatever he was about to say could tip the scale in one direction or the other—and also that if he refused to speak the truth, he might not have the opportunity again. 

“Yes,” he said at last, so quietly that he almost couldn’t hear his own voice.

He’d still been holding Zagreus’s wrist, and now let his fingers slide down until he was holding the prince’s hand. Letting out a shaky sigh, he ran his thumb over Zagreus’s knuckles. 

“I haven’t done a very good job of showing it,” he went on carefully, “and I can’t excuse the way I’ve acted, but ... _ugh_ , I don’t know how to explain myself.”

Zagreus remained quiet, but he squeezed Thanatos’s hand in encouragement for him to continue.

Although he was still afraid to look up, Thanatos pushed on, staring at their interlocked fingers. 

“I was upset, at first. Maybe even angry. But more than that, I was ... worried. About losing you. Or that I’d done something wrong, and that was the reason why you wanted to ...”

He brought his absurd rambling to a stop. It all sounded so pathetic when he said it out loud. He half expected Zagreus to laugh at his poor attempt at putting his emotions into words. 

Instead, Zagreus inhaled sharply. “Than,” he said, sounding a bit choked. Then, when Thanatos didn’t answer, “Look at me.”

Thanatos looked. He took in the familiar sight of the prince’s face, at the small furrow in his brow. 

“It’s not because of anything you did,” said Zagreus. “I was never trying to run away from you. In fact, you’re one of the few things I like about this place—and, honestly, every single time I’ve tried to escape ... I hoped to run into you.” 

Thanatos’s eyes widened in shock. “You ... did? Really?”

A flicker of a smile crossed Zagreus’s face. “Yes, really.” He lifted Thanatos’s hand, and held it against his chest. “I always look forward to our little contests. But it’s also because I like seeing _you_ , and spending time with you—even if it’s just for a minute or two. You’re important to me, Than.” 

This had to be some kind of elaborate hallucination. Or maybe a practical joke of some kind. No, Zagreus wouldn’t be that cruel ... would he? 

Thanatos looked back and forth between the prince’s eyes, as if searching for any hint that he was lying. But all he saw there was heartfelt sincerity. 

“Zag,” he said softly—and then didn’t even know how to continue, could barely comprehend that this was happening. 

“I don’t know what’s going to happen,” Zagreus continued. “I’m still going to try and make it back up to the surface—at the very least, to see my mother again and to learn as much from her as I can. But I can tell you that I have no intention of leaving you behind forever. I care about you far too much for that.”

_Oh_. Thanatos was fairly sure his hand was trembling in Zagreus’s. There was a wild fluttering feeling inside his ribcage, like a trapped harpy trying to break free. 

Zagreus’s smile faltered. “Than?” he said. His grip on Thanatos’s hand had started to loosen. “Have I said something wrong? Please, say something.”

Thanatos did not say anything. 

He did, however, kiss Zagreus. 

It wasn’t until he felt Zagreus’s mouth against his, and heard his faint _mmph_ of surprise, that he suddenly realized what he was doing. He pulled back, mortified, lips tingling from where they’d touched Zagreus’s a moment ago. 

It had been brief, an almost juvenile attempt at a kiss, nothing more than a fleeting press of their mouths together. Thanatos almost didn’t want to see the look on Zagreus’s face or hear what he had to say. _Blood and darkness_ ... He had probably ruined everything.

He considered disappearing immediately—but before he could do any such thing, he felt Zagreus tug on his hand again. Surprised, he stopped and observed Zagreus’s face. Instead of the disgust or confusion he had expected, he found that the prince was staring back up at him with an awed expression, eyes alight as if the very stars were reflected in them. 

He let go of Thanatos’s hand, and dropped the Aspect of Achilles as if it was worth nothing. Then, he reached up to grasp at Thanatos’s hood and pulled him forward until their lips met again. 

Thanatos froze, his entire body going rigid. But his hesitation didn’t last long, as soon as he felt the gentle caress of Zagreus’s mouth against his. Thanatos kissed him back, properly this time, dropping his own weapon so he could place his hands on either side of Zagreus’s face and tilt it upwards. 

Zagreus was so _warm_. Heat radiated from his skin, from his lips that sought out Thanatos’s again and again. Thanatos realized how cold he probably felt in comparison, but Zagreus didn’t seem to mind it. If anything, he seemed eager for the sensation of it, one of his hands resting against Thanatos’s bare bicep while he pressed his other hand against the back of Thanatos’s neck to pull him even closer.

Time seemed nonexistent in the never-ending brightness of Elysium—but it felt especially inconsequential while Thanatos was holding Zagreus against him, absorbing his warmth and kissing him the way he’d always longed to.

All of a sudden, though, he became aware of something strange. Zagreus was suddenly ... shorter? Wait, no. To his embarrassment, Thanatos realized he’d accidentally floated an extra inch or two off the ground. 

“Than!” Zagreus sounded more amused than exasperated. He threw his arms around Thanatos’s waist to pull him back down—so much that Thanatos’s feet actually touched the ground for once, which was a rare occurrence. But it felt ... nice, having the soft grass under his feet, having Zagreus’s arms wrapped firmly around his torso. 

“Trying to escape from me, were you?” 

“What? No,” Thanatos stammered. “I wasn’t ... I didn’t realize I was—”

Zagreus just laughed, reaching up to rest a hand against the side of Thanatos’s face. “You know, I meant it when I said that you’re very handsome when you’re worried. Then again, you look quite handsome all the time.” 

“Oh ... thank you,” Thanatos said, stumbling over the words. He cleared his throat. “As do you.” 

It sounded awkward and oddly formal to his own ears, but ... he _did_ really mean it. And Zagreus did look especially radiant right now, a faint flush on his face and a wide grin lighting up his features. Thanatos quite liked the sight of Zagreus’s smile, and hoped he would get to see it more often from now on. He couldn’t help but let his own mouth turn up at the corner in return.

“Well,” Zagreus said, after they’d been smiling at each other like fools for several long moments, “I’m glad we’ve sorted this out. Although next time, I hope I won’t have to get stabbed in front of you in order to earn a kiss.”

Thanatos’s smile fell. “I’d rather you didn’t.”

“I was only kidding, Than,” Zagreus said with a chuckle. “But, noted.”

He hesitated then, arms starting to loosen from around Thanatos’s waist. “Now, um ... I realize we still have much to discuss. But I probably should be—”

“Right. Of course,” Thanatos blurted, stepping back and levitating slightly above the ground. He held out a hand for his scythe, which leapt into the air and landed easily in his grasp. 

Zagreus had done the same to collect the Aspect of Achilles from where it lay, gripping tightly onto its handle again. He looked Thanatos up and down one more time, as if trying to decide something, then stood on his toes to give him a chaste kiss on the cheek. 

“I’ll be seeing you again soon, then?” he said when he pulled back again.

Thanatos could still feel the lingering warmth on his skin where Zagreus had kissed him, and it was making it a bit more difficult to think than usual. But somehow, he managed a faint smile and a nod. “Of course.”

“Good. Well, I’ll just, um …” Zagreus gestured in the direction of the nearest gates, then started to dash towards them.

“Zag,” Thanatos called. The prince stopped and looked over his shoulder. “Good luck out there.”

Zagreus blinked, then broke out into another grin. “Thank you, Than. I’ll come back to you soon. I swear it.”

Thanatos hadn’t realized just how long he’d been waiting to hear those words, and they made him feel as if an enormous weight had lifted off his chest. He smiled as he watched Zagreus turn and run towards the gates—and for once, he was confident that the prince would return.

When he did finally make it home, Death would be awaiting him with open arms.

**Author's Note:**

> thank you for reading, and i appreciate any kudos, comments, etc.! if you enjoyed this fic, i have another short thanzag fic posted [here](https://archiveofourown.org/works/29381178). 
> 
> you can also follow me on [twitter](https://twitter.com/angst_in_space), where i am often posting my writing updates and wips, and where i update my commissions status. have a wonderful day! 💕


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